A Tale of Two Grades

Well, today started off like any another day at the races around our house. What my son thinks is so uncool about being on time for school is beyond me. Hey Walt, tardies count now!! Thank goodness they didn’t count in upper elementary! His last year at that school they mentioned giving him a special award on awards day for the most tardies…he had 45 that year. Now, he gets ready and we wait until just the right moment , then race to school so he walks in as school bell rings .( I just don’t get it) I was not like that!(jk) I know, I know…I am STILL a lot like that!! It’s funny how much our children are mirror images of ourselves at different stages in our lives. My oldest daughter ,Kati, and I have a running joke that she’s morphing into me on a daily basis. They certainly don’t see it and at times, we don’t either. I remember when my Kati was in the 8th grade and was taking Algebra 1.(anyone that knows me knows that I aced that class-- the 3rd TIME I TOOK IT-… Oh yeah, algebra and I go way back!!!) That same year ,a friend I had gone to high school with asked me to speak at a Sav-a-Life banquet at her church in Alabama. So, another good friend of ours and I loaded up and to Alabama we went! After the banquet we were all up talking and my Kati called. She informed me that she had gotten her progress report that day.She was always an A/B student so when she told me about her c in algebra….I begin this long lecture. My friends were about to hyperventilate over on the other side of the room while they told me to hold on…they had a fun time rehashing my algebra grades and history with grades in general! Needless to say, point taken and she was off the hook as I chose to show her grace----which just opens the door to expound on the “Tale of Two Grades”!! Oh me…where DO I begin? Aaahh yes, October, 1982…..First off, my friend that I stayed with that weekend and spoke at her church, was one of my very best friends in high school ,and shall I say “partner in MANY crimes” in my early high school days! [and happened to be an office worker during her study hall that year… back in the ANCIENT days when a report card WAS A ‘CARD’ and the teacher had to write them by hand and each class had an individual one] Well, it was Mississippi State’s homecoming and EVERYBODY was going to Starkville for the weekend !!! However, Thursday was report card day and I had a D in algebra. Those that don’t know me please understand my family…. My Daddy was high school principal for years ! However, The Lord HAD MERCY on my life (and his) and he went into politics way before my days at HHS!(whew!) My little Mama taught 7th grade math for 30 years ! Those that don’t know Ms. P Thomas must understand…she’s such a lady! From top to bottom---she’s a true lady! Those that don’t know me, while I’m no slob, but certainly don’t share her qualities.Ok—example …imagine if Mary Poppins had given birth to Bette Mitler---- there you have it !!(But please don’t think my mama favors Julie Andrews…she actually has always favored Natalie Wood and Mary Tyler Moore to me—either way—she beautiful) Bless her little worn out heart!! With that out of the way let me return to our “brilliant” plan. My friend was also struggling in algebra so guess what we did? I can just hear her now,”Why don’t we get fake report cards?” Light bulb went off as it seemed like a win/ win solution. Parents happy, me happy…life is good! Now I think that time I changed it to a B. Mama and Daddy were thrilled-- we went to MSU’s Homecoming---life WAS good! I placed fake card in my locker at school because I knew I would need it next time report cards came out. No way I could turn back now…the real ones had my parents forged signature on it. I was really good at both their ‘autographs’ so it seemed smooth sailing.[ ‘Oh what a tangled web’] Next six weeks, around Christmas, grades looked bad in English, Biology, of course Algebra still was awful and actually, they all looked bad. So….oh yes we did…every subject got an upgrade.(even marketing and typing classes) Now, no more average Joe! Holidays were coming around , and it’s the “most wonderful time of the year” and what better gift to give my parents….straight A’s and B’s!!! Hey, especially Mama was thrilled I pulled my algebra up from a B to an A…. high A too!! ( the higher the climb-the HARDER the fall—or CRASH in this case..I have sweaty palms as a type just thinking about it all now) You know…it took a lot of skill to keep up with the lies and not losing the other set of cards. Looks like I could have placed that energy into studying. Ya think? Well, summer is just around the corner ,and I was about to be home free it seemed. I do remember it was beginning to make me numb inside and was feeling the lie I was living. Well, one of my teachers happened to be in the court house one day and ran into my daddy….you know it….BUSTED!!! Oh was I ever!!! This part of the day is forever burned into my memory. First of all on the way home I passed my sister,Kathy, in the road and SHE shook her finger at ME. She NEVER did that so I knew I was caught about something but just wasn’t sure WHICH thing it was!! So, I walked into the door of the kitchen where my mama ,as always at 4 in the afternoon , was cooking supper. Her nose was red which was NEVER good. (she and I have what I call the ‘red nose curse’ that always occurs when you cry-dead give away) She turned to me as if it were slow motion. The only thing she got out of her mouth was “What was your real grade in Algebra?” When I breathlessly answered “27”—DOWN SHE WENT!!!! Out like a light I tell you! I frantically ran to the phone that hung on the wall and called Kathy. I was screaming “I killed Mama, I killed Mama!” I hung up and threw water on her and everything. Oh--did I feel bad bad bad or what!!!! Well, the only other thing I remember was my punishment. My parents should have locked me in a cage or beaten me but….[huge lesson in grace]….they did neither of these things. In fact, the punishment was quiet appropriate. Having only 3 weeks left of school it was imperative I knock the top out of every grade I could! Algebra, as I knew it that year, was over but by the grace of God, I got caught in time to pull all other grades up. I could not go anywhere, talk on the phone to anyone, and had to study A LOT!!! It became a team effort and actually enjoyed hanging out with my parents for a change. I passed every class and made almost straight A’s on all my final exams! It showed myself and reaffirmed what mama and daddy had ALWAYS said…I could make excellent grades if I would just study! It may seem I got off easy…but wait…oh there is more!! When school was over, I was free to regain my social activities, BUT----EVERY weekday morning for the month of June I had to walk with Mama and Kathy a few miles (AWFUL) AND Mama tutored me when we got back until noon in Algebra. Oh…that was the most horrible way to start summer vacation off but…I got in shape and finally learned how to do Algebra. I really did have a final grade of 97 in Algebra the next time I took in. My mama is, and always was, and excellent teacher. Well, the next few years in high school, I made average grades and yes….I studied. I learned many lessons that year. The biggest one….don’t EVER listen to ‘my friend’ again!! Just kidding! No…the main thing I learned was I begin to see , even then, that it’s much better to be really bad at something and ask for help-even if it seems like a set back—rather than pretending to be something we’re not. To wear a mask is exhausting and requires way too much energy. No wonder I really never had any substance in friendships, or any relationships at that age. I was just putting on one mask after another. I did not know who in the world I was so how was anyone else supposed to? Well, I am glad those days are far behind me and God gave me enough wisdom to know how and when to share my past life with my children.(and my mama and daddy) I am so thankful my children have learned from many of my mistakes and though we have laughed, and cried over a few of my past choices, God has used each of them! I am so thankful my parents showed me grace because it spoke louder than any other action that they could have taken! I wish I could say that was the end of my mischievous behavior but.. I can not!!! There was MUCH more that would follow that…however….that’s just all I can tell you for now…but I will say that I NEVER-- EVER had a fake report card again!
Well, I had better go to sleep so I can wake my Walt up early so he can get up- get ready- and leave for school once again as if we were in a race-- just to get there in the nick of time! You know…that’s really no big deal now is it? That’s the least I can do!! I have two choices it seems. I can tell him he will go in plenty of time because I SAID SO…or show him grace and let Walt just be Walt. Thanks to Mama and Daddy, I chose grace.
Until next time—
LO