The Song Inside

My ipod is one of my new favorite things!! As I have mentioned in prior blogs, it plays the soundtrack of my life! Many genres are represented and are equipped to accompany any mood that I may find myself in at any time of day.(or usually night) Even though my personality may scream sanguine…I really have more of a melancholy personality. I love to put my earphones in my ears and just transport to where I can completely unplug from my world for a little while.(I have been doing that a lot lately it seems)The thing I have enjoyed the MOST about downloading music on i-tunes is I have , at my fingertips, any song my heart desires!! OH MY!!! This is a music lovers dream come true! Growing up we bought a 45 record or an album. My favorite pastime was to here a song somewhere and try to guess who I thought the musician was then----“hunt” for a match! Example: Did any of you happen to know that I am a Days of Our Lives fan? (ha ha—calm down..it’s just a joke) Anyway, I remember many days during my teen years hearing a song on an episode and thinking..hey, I know that voice! Sure enough…matched Peabo Bryson, Eric Carmen , and several others! One that I fell in love with from that show is on my I pod today. Eric Carmen has been one of my favorites for decades. His hits were ‘Never Gonna Fall in Love Again’ –‘Hungry Eyes’—‘All By Myself’(His version is much better than Celien’s in my opinion-and do I sound a bit like Casey Kasem or is that just me?) My favorite, however, was never popular but debuted on Days in summer of 1983 and was entitled ‘The Way We Used to Be’. I will never forget matching his voice and FINALLY locating the album in the mall in Oxford! I was equally thrilled finding it on i tunes! Hey, some people collect dishes, shoes, jewelry, etc…I collect music! I can’t remember not being absolutely in love with it!!! My very first favorite song was ‘Puff the Magic Dragon’. My family would beg me to turn off my little blue record player and try to convince me it was tired! Lol ( that never worked) My second obsession was David Cassidy at age 4. OH MY!!! Still have 3 Partridge Family albums but didn’t feel urge to download on I tunes.( sorry David, please forgive me-Shaun, you too.. I once loved you as well) My love is for such an array of music. I am listening to the ‘Phantom of the Opera’ at this moment , but my I pod is on shuffle so KISS may bust out next! I have some Garth, Mariah,James Ingrim, Barry Manilow, Elton John, Josh Groban,Lori Harrington, classical , Billy Joel, Jessica Simpson , GLADYS KNIGHT, and TONS more! I never know what’s next! (kind of like life – ya think—and that was a little exciting putting my name among those greats!) One thing I have gotten a kick out over the years is hearing lyrics in a song that I HAD WRITTEN LONG before that song was even a thought. Guess it should upset me that I never got that credit but I’m just grateful I had a great idea for a song! I wrote my very first song at age 15 years old after my favorite teacher in high school,MRS HILL, challenged us during our poetry section to write our own. Well, that started it all…..took me fifteen minutes to write “It Was You” . A dear friend of mine had been killed in a car wreck the year prior and much was inside me ---so, the music therapy begin! What healing! Oh my that was the greatest thrill or so I thought…few weeks later my AMAZING voice teacher , Jane Smith, played my melody.DID SHE EVER!!!!!!! It was a REAL song! We took it to a local guy that had a make-shift studio in his house. Drums, base and acoustic guitar were added…..OH MY!!! I recorded it and my musical dreams were born , and my life long love affair with creating music or birthing whatever is inside me that needs to be expressed! I even was sent to the Mid-South Fair in Memphis with that song! Later, I went on to write many more and still crank out a few now and then. I play my own keyboard now though. (ear only—don’t be impressed) Enough to send for a copyright though. One song on my I pod is ‘All My Life’ by K-Ci & Jojo! (ooo “Aubrey” by Bread just came on!!---love it) Anyway, I will never forget hearing that song for the first time and hearing “You picked me up when I was down” ---my lyrics from 1983 ‘It Was You’ --“You picked me up so high I thought I never would come down”-----that was pretty cool!! And once in an Elton John song in the 90’s he had used an identical chord progression as me !(Tabb Dendy witnessed that!) Often little reminders of my past lyrics or music pop up and always make me smile! People often ask me if my songs are inspired or made up! I’ll say ...both. Now, one of my personal favorites that I wrote in 1989 was “Winds of Change”. (Actually won Gum Tree Songwriter’s Contest with it) Sounds like a true love song , and while it may have had 'hint' of past remembrance in it ,but the main source of inspiration was we were FLAT BROKE! I find I write the best music when I am in a TRUE TRUE mellow funk!(weird or unique—use which word you prefer) It’s like I can’t rest until I have truly given birth to a song…everything I have ends up being poured into a song I’m writing. My feeble attempt at the piano always becomes a full symphony in my head and heart. The words are always in there, they just have to surface to my heart and onto paper! I’m always exhausted but ecstatic after I’ve completed a song! It’s been a few years since I have written a song. Oh, we have had PLENTY of drama but haven’t had the desire that I have to get before I can write a song. Where has it gone? I wonder if my song is gone or just hiding? My biggest fear is not to feel the words or music or to lose my passion. How dull life must be for someone who lives without passion.(James Ingrum…”How Do You Keep the Music Playing is on now—BEAUTIFUL) I think the most miserable soul in this world is the one who had passion and misplaced it---or IGNORED it so long they forgot it… Or just flat lost it!! That would be death to a part of them…. A part I truly believe God created for a purpose. You know someone , I am sure , who just gave up on dreams , people, or maybe even life because they didn’t see it working the way they thought it would. Well, my question is does anything really turn out the way anyone thinks??? Heavens NO!! I don’t really think one part of my life was what I expected it to be….but what happy a surprise most of it’s been! When my girls would be having a life crisis growing up, we’d get out the spoons and Blue Bell and TALK TALK TALK…and with Marykelli, we’d always CRY CRY CRY too!! But to both of them I’d remind them that it was ALWAYS something next! Expect it and be excited because change was inevitable…life always happens!! I still tell myself and my girls this.(Walt doesn’t really care right now—boys are different) Just like my I pod shuffle…..it’s always surprise what’s next!(Bryan’s Song is on now…one I wrote for Marykelli…good one and good timing) I thought at one time, because I lived in Houston, that my dreams couldn’t come true…well, I’m still alive and have a lot of living to do!! My dreams come true every day in one way or the other! I wrote a children's book back in 1990 and am about to send it to a publisher.(Marykelli illistrated it when she grew up) Will they say no..yes..will I hear anything at all... WHO CARES?? I will have done it…and hey, do you know how many publishers are in this world? I also have recorded several songs in my life in a studios from Nashville and all over Mississippi. Not that I could have “made it”, but realized early on that I’d rather have my family than that lifestyle !! I still record in studios but now just because I love it! So , I have peace knowing I accomplished part of that dream. Enough of it to know that God had a different dream weaving inside my heart . His are always BEST! Imagine that! That God sure is good! Well, I am sleepy and am headed for bed. Maybe I will write a song soon but even though it may not manifest…I realize that I always have a song inside. ALWAYS. Sometimes I forget to stop and hear the music but that doesn't mean it's not there now does it? And I always need to remember...that is where I find the words also! It’s part of me…it’s who I am. And who knows what’s next….but you can bet ….SOMETHING IS!!Get excited…life is happening... (Aww Man…. “Sometimes When We Touch” by Dan Hill is on now----LOVE IT)
Well, that’s all for now…my music and I are going to sleep. OH WAIT…”When Doves Cry” just came on! Going to bed AFTER I try once more to remember our cheerleader dance we did to this song senior year.(No wonder I can never sleep) My what's next happens so fast sometimes.

All for now....
LO